Should I Stay or Should I Go?

shouldistay

Should I stay or should I go? That’s a great question I’ve been asking myself pretty much lately. The Dominican Republic is a great place to live, with all and all of its great variety of complex issues (historical high government corruption levels, gun violence, and much more). And the question itself has its roots on what I would love to do with my life.

Honestly, I don’t really see myself doing a career in Marketing, although I’m good at that and all. But, I’m not sure why. I loved my university years (I really did!), they were some of the best in my entire life. Attending university, helped me be who I am today, for good or bad, it did. Sometimes, I wish I could be 12 again, and basically not giving way too many f**** about everything.

bumpsahead

Back to the question, anyone who was born & raised between the 1980s and the 1990s is expected to achieve multiple academic titles during their lifetime. Being one of those kids, whose parents fought really hard to get them through life comfortably (like my parents, for example), almost everyone I know is expecting a lot from me or their peers, and sometimes, I’m just there. In the spectrum. Being another individual that lives life day by day, and not worrying as much as many people on what’s happening tomorrow, since basically we don’t know what tomorrow has to offer.

So, Master degrees, MBA’s, executive programs, diplomas, and so many other courses are available, too many options, too many choices, and basically, I haven’t experienced enough in my field (or life in general) for me to say: “This is what I want to do”.

Right now, I think I am in one of the lowest points in my life: lost, directionless,  and just living every day as it goes. And I’m depressed, not severely or extremely, but I am and I feel that way mostly when I’m by myself and start having way too many thoughts up in my head. I see many of my friends or acquaintances achieving goals, like the ones I may have in my head, but the fire I once had, is now gone, or at least, it’s been temporarily gone.

choosingpaths

I seriously want to leave my country to obtain my Master’s degree or to work, whichever comes my way. I need to breathe a new air, a new vibe, and live outside of my comfort zone so I can start growing more as a person, as an individual. But I’m aware of several bumps in the road I will face, at least attempting to leave this sunny paradise I’ve called home for more than 2 decades. It’s hard, but if several people I know could, I can too, however, there are too many things going through your head before such a huge step.

Changes are hard, and sometimes you really want a change in your life, but sometimes you don’t know where or how to make it happen. In the end, it’s all about making choices, decisions. And in some cases, you need to think it twice before saying yes or no to absolutely anything.

Right now, I’m all about going. Yes, going. In the DR I’ve made my life – and I say so literally, but I need to open my wings and fly, and the more I stay here, the more stuck I will end up feeling. I love it here, but sometimes, a change for me is what I need. And the more I stay in the homeland, the more I feel I will stay in the same vicious circle I’m currently in.

grabbingbags

Is the adventure of a lifetime awaiting next? We’ll see. I’m working very hard this time around, to see, if by my own merits new opportunities come my way and I start to see a new path for me.

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